#12 brainstorming on old company

[tarobun]

My mind often mulls over how I felt at my previous company and ways to articulate it, to myself and others. Here are some little mental highlights:

- stifling, corporate environment
--> we care about our work and meeting our targets, not about you (that said, they did invest in personal development and had good benefits, so not true in all aspects)
- stuffy, pretentious & egocentric culture
--> "meritocracy"
--> "working here is so great" "we are exceptional" etc.
- vaguely hostile (to authenticity, freedom of expression, happiness)
- formal, not casual work environment
- aloof co-workers
--> lack of real mentorship attitude (aside from maybe one or a few people)
--> some pettiness on part of some co-workers (at least one was petty, one was defensive, one had an ego; the people from France were plain hard to work with (perfectionist, uncompromising, lack of understanding). generally, some snideness, badmouthing and alliances was a typical attitude. conflicts were not well-managed or resolved. suffice to say, I didn't love working with the people there, although I could tolerate it.)
- related to subpoint above, politicking. felt limiting and that I didn't want to deal with it if I rose in ranks in the future
- a little bit of bro culture, e.g. oh we all like to party and drink and socialize ... male leadership and authority was the default / norm. I would have stuck out being feminine or myself in certain respects, which made me less confident to do so
- lack of transparency; feeling like they were happy to try to take advantage as me as a junior developer by paying me a low salary

What this translate to in what I look for:
- empathetic culture, where co-workers on a team genuinely care about each other as team mates and enjoy working with each other
- some mentorship attitude
- humility as a company value (not hubris or overinflating egos to make external impressions)
- lack of ego in individuals who lead the company or manage the team (and in general team members)
- an environment that fosters creativity (freedom of process, open feedback and suggestions)
- casual environments rather than one oriented to maintaining a professional outlook and conformity
- an environment where I feel comfortable being myself and feel empowered to grow authentically and act confident
...